Mark Danger Powers

drummer • educator • author

Change Your Direction

Author and speaker Jim Rohn was crediting as having said,

“You cannot change your destination overnight,
but you can change your direction overnight.”

In other words . . . we may not always be able to instantly, as if by magic, change our current situation. Make that scary career move. Get out of that draining relationship. Be rid of that pile of debt.

But we can start making decisions and taking actions that will drastically [and positively] alter the direction our lives are heading. And we can start that right now. This very moment.

One of the best courses of action to take when you’re stuck in that seemingly endless rut? Ask for help. But, if you’re anything like me, asking for help is almost non-existent in your vocabulary. You’re strong. Confident. Value your independence. You don’t need anyone else’s help, advice or guidance. You can take on the world single-handedly . . . any day, any time. You don’t dare show fear, weakness or imperfection.

Asking for help. I hate it. But I recently did just that. I’d like to say that I accepted a trusted friend’s input and assistance because I was able to overcome that fear of asking for it. But that wouldn’t be remotely close to the truth. Nope, as we spoke on the phone, I was still scared to death.

Then why did I even deal with that and bother to put myself in that situation at all? Because I know that I have some rather lofty future goals in-mind. I’ve also grown to realize that no one man (or woman) can accomplish some of those things by him/herself. Certainly not I. And I’ve learned through experience that nothing stands in our way as vehemently as the roadblocks we create for ourselves. The decisions we make. The prejudices we carry. The mistakes we fail to learn from. Remove those obstacles and holy crap- you’re completely unstoppable!

So, yeah . . . asking for help totally sucked. However, I swallowed my pride, struggled through that difficult phone call, transparently laid my troubles out on the line, and already feel better. A true friend lent a caring ear, gave useful opinions and advice, and selflessly offered assurance and support. The conversation helped me to get my head on straight, see possible solutions to the problem (or should we say, opportunity) at-hand, and become more aware of adjustments I can make in my day-to-day life now that will positively affect what I’m able to accomplish in the future.

It did not immediately change my destination . . . my current place in life.
But it definitely changed my direction.

—–

Take action NOW —–>

1. No clue how to get over that hurdle you’ve been avoiding for weeks, months or years? Ask for help. Suck it up. Do it. Change your life for the better, give yourself the ability to move past that bump in the road, and never look back.

2. Have you already had an experience where asking for help made all the difference in the world? If you’re comfortable sharing in a comment below, it would be great to know I’m not the only one in this boat.

There are millions of stimuli fighting daily for even a moment of your attention. I sincerely thank you for taking the time to visit here and read!

(photo by Calsidyrose)

10 Comments

  1. Thanks for sharing this, Mark!

  2. Hey, Mark; reading this made my day. Thank you! I have been there too, I think I know what you mean. I don’t know what I would do if I couldn’t ask for help. I hate asking for help, too. (being a grownup is overrated)
    Here is a thought; when you ask someone for help, they can take your request as a huge compliment from you. When we are stressed and need help, we can forget about the other person’s perspective. Many (if not most) people are willing to lend a hand, depending on how they are approached.
    Excellent post, as always. Keep up the good work. You are one of the good ones (and there aren’t many of us around!). Be well.

    • Wow, Corby- thanks for the killer comment! Very cool that you mention that your request might be taken “as a huge compliment.” After this post went live, I was texting with the helpful friend that I refer to above, who suggested the exact same thing herself!

  3. I think many people relate asking for help as synonymous with giving up when in truth it’s much more like a partnership. You’re not asking someone to actually do something for you, you’re asking for insight, knowledge and support. It sounds like this was exactly how you approached it. Maybe sometimes we confuse asking for help with asking for approval or soliciting an opinion on what we are doing with no real intent to hear anything more than what we really want to hear. I know that I have fallen into that trap. It’s critical appraisals of what we are doing that give us the most useful information and help us to make the best decisions. Definitely asking for help, advice or input and being open to what friends give you is a great way to get over the hump.

    • Very true, man. Getting “over the hump” can often require nothing more someone else’s insight. Their differing view can be absolutely invaluable, offering you a solution you hadn’t considered, or even just a new perspective on the problem. Thanks for adding this, Matt!

  4. Hi Mark,

    Loved your post. It’s hard for me to ask for help..very humbling.
    Taking definite action…that’s the other baby step.
    Your blog sure helps!

    Best,

    Steve

    • Thanks, Steve- I certainly see you taking definite action with some of your goals, including the new site(s). Can’t wait to see StartDoNow up and running!

  5. I have a life mentor. Ann is 55, a middle school science teacher, and definitely not what one would think of as a sexy, girly, support system for high heels and late night drinks.
    But she knows me. My fears, my boy troubles, my illness and insecurities from it, and is always available for me to dump out my latest mini drama. This woman is a steady companion, a trustworthy friend, and may well be my maid of honor at my wedding.
    I encourage -everyone- to have a life mentor. She’s like a parent, only I know that she’s purposed toward me because she chose to love me as an adult, when I’d already become who I am. Simply knowing you always have someone who will always be there for you and always accept you is… invaluable.

    And sometimes we even go out for late night drinks 🙂

    • Simply knowing you always have someone who will always be there for you and always accept you is… invaluable.” <<< This is so true, Rose. It is vitally important to have someone that really knows you, someone you can always turn to, trust and lean on. Thanks for sharing this! We all need an Ann. Or a Ben. Or a . . . okay, I'm done. 🙂

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